Lessons learned.

It's been over a year. Not intentionally, but it happened. I really wish it hadn't because so much has happened in this last year that I wish I had shared with everyone while it was happening. But to be honest, I forgot about this blog. I don't know how I forgot about it, but I did. And then my cousin Jennifer sent me a message and said she came across it. And it's been my own words that have reminded me who I am and what I am capable of. It's been my own words that I needed to hear.

This last year has been one of the most amazing, emotional, heartbreaking,beautiful, tough years of my life. I cant believe it was only a year ago that I told my ex goodbye. It also means it was a year ago that I told my father goodbye as well. It was a year ago I started my internship at my church, which has now ended.

I learned a lot in this last year. I learned how to listen. To really listen. To stop and allow others to speak, value their voice and opinions. Through that, I've learned (and am learning) that I don't always need to talk. That sometimes I say more by not saying anything. I learned that sometimes I learn more by not saying anything. I learned the difference between emotions based on truth and emotions based on lies. I learned that not all emotions need to be reacted to.

 I also have learned how my emotions feel. What I mean by that is, I learned how my body reacts to specific emotions. We physically feel our emotions and when we know what we are feeling in our bodies we can understand our emotions better. And even combat or support emotions by changing how our bodies are reacting. For example: When I get defensive or angry I get really hot. Specifically in my chest and neck area. So when I start to feel that emotion, I am able to calm myself down and not over react. I then am allowed to approach the situation more calmly and logically. I am still working on this.

 Through this I have also learned to not to make decisions based on emotions. I have found when I am over emotional I make very poor choices. Instead of making decisions when I am emotional, I allow time to pass. That choice isn't going anywhere, it can wait. There is no sense in rushing it and possibly making a poor choice because I am emotional. Because I know that everything works out in time, it has allowed me to not feel like I need to fix things right away. This has allowed me to let things unfold and make the best choice for me. It truly has been life changing.

I have learned a lot of things this past year, and I hope I continue to share them with you all. That I dont take another year to write another blog. But for now, I think these speak volumes.